Aversion to Light
Hi everyone! As the “guest facilitator” for today’s discussion, I’m kicking off a series of surprise guests that the Nurture Commission will feature each Saturday during Lent. Come back every Saturday to find out who the next guest will be!
It might seem funny that I am the first guest, as I have no formal training in Biblical or spiritual subjects or knowledge, and yet I felt called by this particular devotional entry. It spoke to me on a deeply personal level, but it also meant a lot to me as a person with a unique position in the church. For those who may not have met me, I grew up in the Elizabethtown Church of the Brethren. Over the years, I moved away and came back several times, always feeling drawn to the community and its history. These days, as Chair of the Nurture Commission, I find myself reflecting on my role in the church as a Board member.
In Walt Wiltschek’s own words from today’s devotional, “if you want to keep things hidden, it’s best to keep the blinds closed.” I’ve been thinking a lot about these words in the context of my own secrets that I try so strongly to hide. I’ll share one with you now. When I receive a text from a friend lately, asking how I’m doing, I immediately put on a smiling face. “I’m good, you?” The truth that I’ve been hiding is that I’m not good. In fact, I’ve been suffering. For two years, as a parent with a small child, I’ve been in a state of constant paralysis. Nervousness about Covid exposure has turned into nervousness about everything: who I am as a woman and a mother, who I am as a member of this wonderful church community, who I am as a Christian, and who I am as a human being. That might sound a little dramatic, but it’s the truth.
Wiltschek refers to followers of Christ who welcome the light, while reminding us that there are those who hide in darkness. But in my mind, it’s not so black and white that there are people choosing either road. We all have secrets and things we wish to keep in the darkness, as the pastors have so artfully expressed over the last few Sundays. Perhaps the reality is that the hiding of secrets is itself the sin. When we speak truth to power, we invite the light.
Lois, I so much agree about the light shining when we are gathered. I think we'll have some great opportunities to do that in our congregation in 2022, especially when we literally have more light in the form of sunshine and we can spend more time outdoors. It sounds like you have made excellent use of your time during the pandemic, but I'm sure some parts of it weren't easy, especially in the beginning. It seems like you and I are both similarly nervous about the threat of Covid, even if we have different reasons. I hope that the coming months bring us out of our cocoons a bit so that we can truly enjoy time with others. We are lucky to have you as part of Nurture this year!